A Bad Relationship And How To Avoid It
No one wants to be in a bad relationship, but many people find themselves in one. When people meet for the first time and get to know each other, there is excitement and both are on their best behavior. After the dating relationship progresses sometimes so does other behavior that can make the relationship less then desirable.
Therefore, it is important to avoid a miserable relationship by setting boundaries and limits for yourself as well as your partner.
Goal One – Be Your Own Person
It is important that you establish the fact that you are your own person at any level of a relationship. It does not matter if it is someone that you have been dating for six months or have been married to for twenty years. You both need to be your own individual person with your own goals, dreams and desires.
Each partner should have the right to speak, make decisions and be a part of the relationship planning. All of the responsibility or decision-making should never fall on one person only. Not only is this unequal distribution of "say so" unfair, it can also lead one partner to become resentful.
Goal Two – Set Financial Guidelines
It is extremely important that both parties have some financial freedom. Again, it doesn’t really matter the amount of time that you have been dating this person. You should still have access to money in case of an emergency or if you decide that you no longer want to be in the relationship. Never give complete control of the finances to anyone. Financial matters should be a joint venture.This is a leading factor in a bad relationship. If you talk to most women that are miserable, they will gladly say that they are stuck because of finances. What does that tell you?
Goal Three – Speak Your Mind
Having a voice in the relationship is another way to ensure that you are not submissive or jumping at every command. Voice the things that are important to you and remember it takes two to have a successful dating relationship. Your partner can not do this alone and if he/she wants to then bow out, let them.
Each person has a right to their opinion and voice in the relationship; one of the leading abuse tactics in a bad relationship is control.
Speaking your mind will also ensure that you command the respect that you much deserve. If you sit in silence and always go along with what your partner has to say, eventually they will come to realize that you are not going to demand anything. Some people will get worse and make unruly demands if you do not keep an active say!
Dating is about two people that love each other and want what is best for the team, not only themselves.
Goal Four – Have A Good Time
If you can not have a good time in a dating relationship with this person, they are most likely not the one for you. Having a good time, laughing and relaxing together are the keys to dating success. If you feel bored, put down or insecure around your partner chances are that you are moving toward a bad relationship. Try to fix the situation, but if it fails, move along, with someone else!
Learn to respect the other person and do not run at the first signs of trouble. Every relationship in the world will have difficult times and you can not leave without good reason. It requires common sense and a balancing of the good and bad in the relationship. If you find that the bad outweighs the good then consider this a miserable dating relationship and pack your bags. If the good outweighs the bad, then work hard on the relationship and stick it out for a while longer!
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