10 Ways To Be A Desirable Woman


Matthew Hussey

In every situation showing class counts. Even if you are approached by a guy in whom you have no interest, you should still show your class. Show it by how you respond, shake his hand, thank him for his approach and decline in a kindly manner.

Remember that you should regard all approaches to you as compliments. Whether you find the guy of interest or not does not change the fact that he has recognised something attractive in you and he is not wrong! You can empathise with how difficult it is for a guy to take make that initial approach. If this approach is made in a manner that doesn't deserve your kindness, maintain your class, show no emotional response either way, merely be firm and tell him that you have to get back to your friends. Nothing can be gained from rudeness. If there are quality men in the room who want to approach you the image of you being rude, abusive or even laughing at someone else will deter them and ultimately the loser will be you.

Take Risks

You should be taking risks on a daily basis, in everyday situations. Now of course when we say this we are not suggesting you should put your safety at risk and in all circumstances you should follow our golden rules on safety. No we mean take social risks! When was the last time you opened a conversation with an attractive stranger whilst buying your starbucks coffee? When did you last see a guy reading a book and ask him his opinion of it? Opportunities open up to the those who put themselves on the line in all aspects of life, and this is just as evident in social interactions and our personal lives. Next time you sit down for lunch or are your in the middle of a shopping trip, spark up a conversation with the first person that takes your eye...who knows what could come of it!

Master Your Signals

Many women think they know how to give the appropriate signal when its required. What they often fail to appreciate is that the male receptors are usually no better at reading those signals than noticing the one and a half inches you had cut off your hair earlier that day. So please, give them the best chance possible to read your signs! Try our proven two-cue-and-smile formula. E.g. Flash him a look that shows you noticed him (now he is pleased you've acknowledged his existence)...a couple a seconds later turn to him again and give him a second look, this time use slightly more intensity and hold his gaze for a second or so longer (now he's had confirmation that he didn't imagine the first look, so he'll now be looking for an opportunity)...now its time to pull out the big guns, wait for the next opportunity to catch his eye, and when your eyes meet, flash him that beautiful smile you save only for great jokes and guys who you hope will prove to be your next prince charming.

Find His Passion

Rather than developing the most obvious conversation, asking what he does for a living, instead find out what he loves, where his true interests lay. If you cut through the crap and can make the transition to talking about what's truly important to him, he will appreciate you immensely.

There are many reasons why this is important. Firstly, if you ask a man what he does, you may as well ask for a copy of his last payslip so you can see how much he earns, even if this wasn't your intention! This may well be of some interest to you but it will not help to make it so obvious at this stage! Secondly, your target may not earn his living doing what he loves so talking about his job could be counter productive and off the mark, not to mention make him feel uncomfortable.

Discovering his real passion enables you to give him the chance to talk about what really makes him feel good. In talking about his passion, he will inevitably associate that pleasurable part of his life with you, creating a strong association between you and the good feelings he experiences when thinking about that passion.

Pay Attention

Men may be ignorant creatures when it comes to subtle body language and emotions but we do know when we are not being listened to. When he's talking, listen intently. We all want to be heard, and when someone listens like we're the only person in the room it makes us feel important, and of course a guy will love the woman who makes him feel this important. Many of you may dread doing this while he talks about the lastest football match, or the deal just closed at work, all of which may hold no fascination for you whatsoever. However, even if you can't share his excitement at least commit to focusing on what he is saying...that way when you want to lead the conversation into something more interesting to you he will feel secure in the knowledge that you paid him due respect while he was talking. It can be hard enough getting men to relax, to open up and be real, so don't make them feel bad the moment they say something which doesn't exactly excite you.

Learn The Art of Physical Contact

Where touching is concerned (outside of the bedroom...), trust us when we say less is more. A subtle, well calibrated touch on the arm or the chest at the right moment gives sufficient encouragement for the guy to realise he is doing ok and to carry on. But please please please, don't molest! I remember a specific time when a girl broke this rule in the extreme when she decided to communicate interest by leaning in and biting my ear so hard, evidently having lost all her sensory acuity through alcohol, my eyes began to water. There really is nothing sexy about going home with a throbbing ear from an over-zealous girl trying to be sexy. All extremes aside, there is a fine line between an encouraging, flirtatious touch (yes that can include hitting...lightly!) and those over the top acts of affection. Not least of all, many men will naturally make the assumption, if you are extremely affectionate right away, that you must also be like it with everyone else, and that is not an attractive notion.

Separate From The Pack

What you deem to be an innocent scene, with you and your friends huddled together laughing at each others jokes, can look like a protective pack of wolves from a mans perspective. Appreciate that there are many great guys out there who are not in the habit of waltzing up to a single random woman who has captured their interest, let alone one amongst a whole group standing together. Although it can be hard for a guy even to approach a woman on her own you have a much higher chance he'll be willing to take that risk if all your friends aren't in hearing (judging) range. If you never peel off from the pack and play lone wolf now and again you will be missing out on tons of great guys...so be confident enough to stand alone, you noble creature!

Get Noticeable

Men should notice you when you enter their world. You should shine brightly, if only through your obvious energy. Make a conscious effort to work on the outward aspects of yourself - your body language, your posture, and your facial expressions. Your clothes should communicate part of who you are. Makeup can be great for making you feel great, but don't be fooled into relying on the idea that guys are noticing much about it. They will pick up much more subconsciously on how confident you appear in your own skin. So enter every room with a smile on your face and with obviously positive energy, and you will be noticed.

Use Your Voice

The voice is a powerful tool, awakening our auditory senses and bringing what we see in front of us to life. Be wary of how you sound. Does your voice play out like a smooth jazz record in a cocktail lounge or does it more closely resemble a pneumatic drill? When you talk, even if you're in a loud environment, don't shout at men, it drowns all of your potential subtlety and sexiness. Lower your voice slightly, and soften it when you talk, even if it means he has to get a little closer to hear you, it will work wonders for the sense of intimacy in the interaction and the effect you have on his senses.

Ask Questions!

The reasons for this are threefold: Firstly it is essential that you put men at ease if you want to develop a conversation in which you can see the best side of them. A sure way to do this is by asking 'open ended' questions as these will elicit more wide ranging responses and enable you to really find out about the guy. Secondly it also serves to convey the important idea that you are genuinely interested in him. We are not referring to conveying the idea that you are sexually interested at this stage but asking 'open ended' questions which show that you are interested in him as a person. This itself can be very flattering and will inevitably create a range of possibilities for you with him. One of the most important rules of human interaction is that we like to spend time around people who are genuinely interested in us.

Finally, by asking such questions you proactively search for the qualities which you are looking for in your guy e.g. whether he is a risk taker, generous, kind, leads an interesting life, has a sense of humour etc. You will not always be able to perceive the existence of the qualities unless you learn to use the 'open ended' questions and unique conversational techniques which form part of our "Get the Guy' training. The biggest limitation of all initial social interactions is that the standard questions we ask provoke standard responses which really don't tell us much about the person we're talking to. To get your guy you need the techniques to open up this information in a fast, effective but attractive manner to maximise the results you achieve with guys even when this initial social interaction may be short. You will save yourself a lot of time trying to discover whether he meets your criteria or not and simultaneously appear so much more attractive to him.

Good Luck

Matthew Hussey

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